Current Mood:
1:36 p.m. - 12/26/2017
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Anxiety sneaks up on me out of nowehere. I wish people could see its approach and warn me. Or at least not think I was insane.
I'm having a conversation and someone says something. Not anthing negative, just anything at all. It could be Hi Leandria. And if my guard isn't up then anxiety will creep in on me and destroy me right there mid conversation. Pre conversation since all that was said was Hi thus far. Because suddenly anxiety is screaming in my head, didn't you hear that condescension in their tone when tehy said hi? They probably hate you and are just being nice. Remember that one time a million years ago when you were 2 minutes late for something they invited you to? Well they've never forgiven you and that's what that tone is about." By this time my chest is starting to tighen and there's a sinking feeling in my stomach. I say Hi back tryign to conceal the panicked breathing that is starting to set in as my heart starts racing and my mind tells me more lies. The I check out because I feel like I'm going to die. My heart feel like it is being squezzed to death and my lungs feel like they aregoing to explode. I must focus on regulaitng my breatihng and slowing down my heart rate to stay alive. My head is now throbbing too. I want to pass out to stop the stress.
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