Current Mood: bitchy
5:33 p.m. - 01/17/2009
the annoying as hell inauguration weekend begins
I'm in a really pissy mood right now. Patially becasue unless I want to deal with temperatures below freezing and annoying Obama tourists that have taken over DC, I have to stay in this weekend, and I'm bored. I had Trisha and kate over yesterday but its not like i can really do that today becasue Andre has annoying obama tourists staying with us in the loft, so how can I use it to entertain company if they're there. I hate the fact that his guests are using my stuff. I hatre sharing my bathroom with them. I hate the fact that someone ate or threw away my last slice of pizza without asking me. I hate sharing my toothpaste and body wash. I mean dont get me wrong if these were my frriens I'd be happy to share, but why the hell are Andre's guests using my bathroom? I'm going to make a point to make it as messy and unfriendly as possible. I hate the fact that they keep turning the heat all the way up. Are they going to pay for the increase in our gas bill? No. Well deal with the temperature we like to keep the house. I hate that I feel obligated to actually wear clothes when i walk around instead of the bare minimum like I normally do. I hate that one of the things i'm trying to get away from is right in my home.Seriously, I think people that spent a ton of money to come to DC and deal with this inauguration mess are insane and stupid. First black president. So what? Who cares? I guess I'm a little more progressive than the rest of the world becasue race means absolutely nothing to me. So this whole black president thing being a big deal doesnt comprehend in my mind. I'm feeling especially bitchy this weekend. Lucky for Andre and his guests, I can't help but be nice to people. The other day I was hanigng out with Joe and I was tlaking about a friend of mine who was really moody and did something to make me mad. Then I said, "but I can't really hold it against them, everyone gets moody sometimes. I can be super bitchy at times" and Joe said "Lea I have never seen you be mean or bitchy since the day i met you." And I guess it's kind of true. When I'm in my moods, i try to stay away from people so I'm not mean. And if I do snap at someone, I try to play it off like I didnt mean it. Or I do soemthing really nice for them afterwards. I must say I hate this aspect of my personality. I'm in a bad mood, and I really want to taker it out on the rest of the world. but I can't/ And that sucks. I want to say Andre let your ghetto guests use your bathroom not mine. I want to tell them not to touch my stuff. I want to tell them how stupid they were for coming all this way to stand out in the cold and not see anything. I actually want to pretend I'm a repulican and be really mean and talk trash about obama supporters, but I definately couldnt do that. SO I sit here and bitch about all the things that are annyoing me online, instead of actually saying anyhting. AHHHHHHHHH! I just want to scream! I hate feeling this way! Why is there always so much crap going on in my life? Why can't everything ever just work out nicely for me? I feel like I'm turning to drugs and alcohol a lot more now than i used to. Still not enough to cause alarm, but more than I ever have before. So I'm a little worried. But I think part of the reason is to substitute for the fact that I'm not having sex with tons of guys anymore. back in Tally when i would do that all the time, I was really really depressed and the sex made me feel so much better. A part of me wants to go back to that, but a much bigger part of me loves the way that sex feels with someone you actually like, and can't bear to just sleep with someone I have no feelings for. Anyway, I think I'm rambling now about nothingness, so I'm going to stop, and get back to being bitchy and mopey in my room.
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