Current Mood:
10:19 a.m. - 10/18/2011
RIP Grievie GW
I feel absolutely horrible today. It's one of those days where I just want to die. I've been spending the morning trying to figure out why and then it hit me. Yesterday was a sad day. GW Grievous, one of my mom's cats died. He had some kind of growth on his lungs that killed him. yesterdya I realize that I kind of ignored it and internalized any sadness I might have felt because I get so annoyed with my mother for her excessive displays of emotion and not being able to hold it together, so I do. it makes me come off as coldhearted and uncaring, but in reality I'm torn up about it. I guess today how upset I am is finally hitting me. As I type this, I'm on the verge of tears. I dind't even get a chance to say goodbye to him since I don't live there anymore and its killing me. I don't know what to do to help my mother with her sadness, and that makes me angry, because I shouldnt have to help her. She should be able to hold it togeher to help me. I feel bad for his twin brother Octo. I wonder how animals react to these things. What they are feeling. GW and WG(octo) were always together, and now there's only one. I wonder how much Octo misses his brother. Okay,now that I've allowed myself to get that out and feel for a minute I have to pull myself back together and go on with life like everything is fine.
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