Current Mood:
1:02 p.m. - 4/3/2006
Death to all skanks
Breaking up with Jacob has hit me harder than I thought it would. I thought it was a good idea, but now I wonder. He hates me now becasue I've been causing all of this drama with this ghetto skank that he works with. The night we broke up, I went to a party with jacob and she, not being 100% sure whether or not we were really broken up, handcuffs him, drags him into the bathroom and makes out with him. She liked him while we were dating and couldn't wait to make her move on him, and that's what pisses me off.
We got into a mini fight at Big Daddy's on Wednesday night. I pulled her cheap ass weave out. Lucckily for her, Kersten and Robbie dragged me to the car and wouldn't let me fight.
I hate the fact that Jacob could be attracted to trash like that, and I hate thte fact that in continuing to be friedns with her, he is kind of choosing her over me.
Why do girls have to be so skanky sometimes. I wish lots of bad things upon her, and I don't feel bad becasue she deserves it.
I don't like the factt hat he hangs out with her, but at least he does come home to the same bed as me every night. He'd never share his bed with trash like her. And our sex life hasn't been better since the breakup, and he aslo would fuck her (and trust me she being the skank that she is has tried).
I mean seriously. Have some respect for a 2 year relationship.
I have aslo recently become very mentally unstable. I'm falling into my hole again, and its not a good feeling. I think that having something bad happen to the skanky ghetto bitch thoguh would make me feel a million times better. Like I said she deserves it.
I;m aslo worried about my future. Will I ever graduate? Will I get into grad school? Will I get a job that I want? And now that i don't have Jacobs security, Will I ever find someone to love me? Will I ever get married and have a family, or am I destined to be alone forever? I have a lto of issues, and its going to be impossible to find someone to put up with my mental instablity, my bitchiness, my superior attitude. I really am a horrible person.... but at least I'm not a skank.
I think I've found someone who might possibly love me, and I could definitely return the feelings, but I think I started burning the bridge to that relationship by staying with Jacob for too long. Waht a waste of time. Waht a slew of missed oppertunities. All for what? A relationship with someone who has no regard for my feelings. A guy who I thought was different, but turned out to be just like all the other hormone driven males I've dated.
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