Current Mood:
8:18 a.m. - 05/03/2007
should i stay or should i go
So I've come to the conclusion that boys really are dumb and deserve to have rocks, no boulders thrown at them. Why is it that they have to make things more complicated than what they are? So at 2:57 am on 4/30/07 I was forced to reevaluate my life and my current relationship status. Just when I give in and accept things the way they are and start moving towards the future I am yanked back into my past. And now I don't know what to do. Should I trust this person in spite of the lack of character he has shown since I've become reaquainted with him? The very nature of our current relationship shows what a shady person he is. Or should I do the logical thing and quite possibly miss out on the best thing that could happen to me in my life? I will admit that I definately still have feelings for him too and I have never experienced the kind of passion that I experience with him with anyone else, but passion can only get you so far. And in the end what would I rather have? A well mannered, well groomed, handsome young professional who I can start a nuclear family with and have that cookie cutter lifestyle or something fun and passionate and unpredictable.
And then there's that other issue... How can he say he's in love with me and continue to be with someone else? That is where I will draw my line. If what he said was true and he wants to be with me then I will not stand for this secret affair that we have any longer. I want everything to be out in the open. But I'm getting ahead of myself. I'm just going to have to wait til the 15th when I go to visit him to see what happens.
And on a side note, I started this out by saying that boys are really dumb, not just one boy, boys in general because a very good male friend of mine is going through the same thing i'm going through only on the opposite end. He's the annoying guy who is dating one girl even though he still has strong feelings for his ex. He sees his ex secretly and thinks that she is the one, but won't break up with the new girl because he doesn't want to crush her heart. When he told me about his situation it was a few hours after my situation occured and I wanted to strangle him. I couldn't believe what he was saying. I'm goign through hell right now because of that type of stupidity.
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