Current Mood: emotionally drained
3:49 p.m. - 06/06/2008
The first movie I ever saw in the theatre alone
Okay, so I did something today that I have never before done in my entire life, surprisingly. I went to see a movie by myself. Yes that's right, ticket for one, seated all alone in the theatre. And it was the worst thing I could have possibly done.
Not the whole going to the movies alone thing really, just the movie I decided to see : Sex in the City. What the hell was I thinking? That is obviously a movie that you need to see with friends. Too bad my friends were jackasses and saw it while I was at work last week, but anyway, I digress. After Andre and Kate saw it they were both so depressed they went out drinking afterwards. That should have told me something. (Although I guess not really since I'm friends with a bunch of lushes)
Well anyway, I mean the movie has a happy ending and all, it's just kind of emotionally exhausting. I think I teared up in the theatre like 5 times. And it really makes you examine your life.
So although we've gone and compared ourselves to the main characters (I'm a Carrie) I'd like to state for the record that my life is not going to end up like hers. Duffie (who is supposedly my Big) is not the person I am going to end up with. He's had his chance and I have washed my hands of him romantically. (although we are still friends, and I'm not sure if he really knows it's over, or rather is ready to accept that its over). And there is no way in Hell I am going to still be single and unmarried when I'm 40.
So anyway, I'm all emotionally exhausted from that movie, and I'm sitting here back at work, (since I left in the middle of the day to see the movie. SHHHHH!!) and all I really want to do is drink, but I cna't cause even when I leave work I'm gonna have to go over to my grandmother's house for TJ's prom. I think I might have to be a lush and stop in the liqor store fisrt, but a bottle of wine, take it to my mom's house and have a few glasses there before walking over to grandma's. It just reminded me of the way I felt when I've had my heart broken and how the motivation to do anything just goes away, and how it feels to find out someone cheated on you. And how hard it is to forgive people even when you still love them. And all this stuff that just makes you want to cry. It sucks. I must now numb myself with lots and lots of alcohol.
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